29th July

I never forget this date. Two years ago, on this day, we headed home after five years travelling outside. Living in the discomfort zone. I experienced what it meant by “the human spirit can handle much worse than we realise” (Nick Vujicic). I can never compare my experiences with others. I know of trailing spouses who have been much worse off than me. That was my discomfort zone and mine to experience.I have emerged a different person. Now, when I fear to do something, I always reminded myself what I have gone through in that five years.

I would never have the courage to hit the books again if not for the five years of experiences. I did things I would never have done if I were to remain in my comfort zone. Did I change? Yes, I did. For the better, I want to believe.

What have I gained in these five years? Independence,  courage, an open mind, the desire to be an agent of change, don’t waste time on unnecessary people or things. What have I lost? Some friendships but really, it is ok. Anything or anyone that cannot stand the test of time is really not worth spending time with. BUT…, I have gained many new friendships, know many good people.

One of the greatest achievement I have during these five years away was a very much deeper relationship with God. It is complete reliance on God when there was no familiar pillars to lean on.
Will I ever uproot again for new challenges? Yes, why not. You know how big is the world out there?

Memories…

US of A (Mar 2008 to Mar 2009)
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farewell 159 farewell 172

Shanghai (July 2009 to July 2012)
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See the difference. The air in US of A is clean and fresh and crisp. See those blurry sky in SH. Well, it was like that 90% of the time. We survived!

Just look at the kids. They were so tiny then. Look at that wee little Ann.

People who cross my path

Apart from learning how to counsel, I have to be counselled too. This is to learn what it is like to be sitting in the other seat.

I was very blessed to have Ms Trina as my supervisor. In the five sessions I had with her, she really taught me a lot. She transformed me from a sparrow to an eagle in the counselling field. She asked tough questions to make me think and think hard. She made me able to empathise with my client and opened my perspective to the world of counselling.  I now have a greater understanding of the process of counselling and working with my client. In this journey with her, my thinking process has broadened and deepened. I would say that I am a much better counsellor now as compared to the first time I met her. I am far from being a professional but I am definitely better than when I first started. Able to use these skills on my kids is indeed a bonus.

A Whole New Perspective

 I have finished my practicum. 

How time flies. Met Mr Loon for my last session of practicum. I did not want to say it was my last time seeing him because I see myself going back to visit him.  I explained to him that I would be going back to school and would not be able to visit him so regularly but I would still make time to visit him. I asked if he had enjoyed the time I spent with him. 

你喜欢我来看你吗?
喜欢,很喜欢。

I do not think it is right to just stop the visitation completely. I will continue to visit, perhaps, fortnightly if time permits or at least once a month. The thing is to keep in touch.

This practicum, the visit to a nursing home has completely changed my perspective towards asking old people to stop work and just rest.

This is a brutal truth…

…the old people in a nursing home who have care-givers to look after them, provide food for them, having 24 hour nursing care. Their lives have no worries. They play bingo, go for outings, have physiotherapies and have volunteers who come to talk to them. Yet, their lives are as good as that of a prisoner. They are ‘caged’ in. They have no freedom to go where they want to go, eat what they like to eat. Even drinking a cup of plain water, they are at the mercy of the caregivers.

…the old people who work in the food court, at the airport, those who sell tissue papers and wet ones. They have complete freedom to do as they wish. If today, they want to eat simply, porridge and egg or tomorrow they want a plate of lard laden cha kuay teow, no one can stop them. They are able to enjoy, they are happy, above all, they have freedom.

Now, when I see old people working, I no longer feel sorry for them. I rejoice with them for they have good health which enables them to earn a decent living and enjoy their lives.  It has been a great adventure doing my practicum at a nursing home. Never have I ever thought I would be able to do something like this but it clearly proved that humans are fully capable of treading on the unknown, entering the discomfort zone. I just need to be bold, to take risk.

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Well said!

I saw this on one of the FB posting and I fully agree with it. On one hand, they ask us to accept them but on the other hand, they do not accept that we cannot accept such lifestyle in our society.

Live your life the way you want to but I do not endorse or agree with the Pink Dot event because I do not want my child to grow up thinking that being gay is fine and dandy. Go ahead be what you want to be but don't advertise it as though it is normal and something to be proud of. You have made your stance, let us make ours without you accusing us of being narrow minded and discriminatory. If you can have a Pink Dot event why can't another group have their Wear White?