Finally, a first taste of an empty nest

We saw off to his BB mission trip to Cambodia. He went there to teach them first aid, paint the school and basically do some community work. I pray that he will bring back some precious lessons he has learned.

 
Try spotting him

The next day, Ann was off for her annual dance camp. Something she always look forward to. Four days three nights of nothing but dance, dance, dance!

Start of the camp

That night, after class, the spouse and I went for late night supper after 14 years. We went back to the same old place for our teochew porridge. Nothing has changed except that food tasted much better 14 years ago!

Visit to the Bird Park

Yeap, boring stuff we do with the kids during school holidays but you will be amazed…they thoroughly enjoy it. A 14yo and a 10yo. There is still a little child in them and these things make them smile.


   
 
The waterfall is still there.


 
Not very well kept. What a shame. We can spend 10mil on two black and white creatures yet we neglect this place which has become iconic in this country.

Celebration in the midst of the mess!

Yes, we dropped everything and took the day off to celebrate Ann’s 10th birthday while the house was still in a big mess. Doing what she enjoys most. We spent a day at Sentosa.


The Luge



Mdm Tussauds museum at Sentosa


Getting her hand waxed.

Always make time for them

In spite of my very busy and very stressful days, life must still go on. I took time out to attend Ann’s Sports Day and of course to support her. It was boring and hot waiting for her event but I knew that my presence meant a lot to her.




4 x 100 m runner up. Yay!!!

Love these shots I took.




We did it!

Part-time contractor

I have changed house so many times and I have only used one contractor but this time, we decided to change. Remember I wrote about we were stuck with two houses. We decided not to use our usual contractor because we thought it was only prudent to save on renovation work in case we really couldn’t sell the house. (When we started renovating, we have not sold the house)

Lesson learned, good contractors are hard to come by, once you found one, you just have to use him for life.

So, we started renovating our house. First mistake, to tile the tiles horizontally, our tiles were tiled vertically. Can we live with it? Is it a major mistake? Do we have to fuss over it? Ok, it is fine. Will just accept it but please be more careful. Aiyo………………what followed were mistakes and more mistakes. Kitchen tiles became toilet tiles, lights positioned wrongly etc, etc, etc… Finally, the kitchen sliding door was like two plank of wood stuck together. No, that cannot be accepted.

How can someone keep on making mistakes? How can?

At one time, I became the contractor and supervise the workers!
The final straw, the air-con started leaking barely three days into staying in the house. Ok, no more being nice, We threatened legal suit. The big boss came down and did service recovery.



Defects


Raining on the inside 

Sometimes, you just need to create noise until action is taken. The big boss from the renovation company came down, the big boss from the air con company came down. Who likes legal suit? Yes, we actually consulted and got some legal advice.

Does kindness always beget kindness? Frankly, no. Do we continue to be kind? Yes, we do.

The call to obey

Why we shifted house after staying in our new place for just two years…

Months before this year's retreat, we were given this verses one morning...

Deuteronomy 28:12-13

The Lord will open the heavens, the storehouse of his bounty,to send rain on your land in season and to bless all the work of your hands. You will lend to many nations but will borrow from none. The Lord will make you the head, not the tail. If you pay attention to the commands of the Lord your God that I give you this day and carefully follow them, you will always be at the top, never at the bottom.

We did not think much about them except that they were just verses for a QT session.We had no plans to attend this year's retreat but changed our mind when one mother came to ask if her son could be roommate with Kai at the youth retreat. She wanted so badly for him to go. We relented and we all went as a family. Dr Lyn, the speaker for the retreat, kept on repeating the same verses, practically everyday. We knew then that God was dealing with us. When we came back from the retreat, nothing was done to what we have heard. Until one morning, the same verses popped up again, literally, jumping out in another QT session. We were amazed by how God kept pursuing us in this area. We felt we had to obey...thus began a frightening journey of faith. Sometime, in July, we put up our home for sale not knowing what to expect. We had a great offer immediately, we were so happy and so began our new house hunting. Our testing began. The seller back out and we bought our new place. As you are aware, the property market went downwards. Selling a house was no longer easy. In the end, we were stuck with two properties and a "fine" - a huge one. As we cried out to God and wondered if He was fooling with us? We could not take this joke , we are a single income family. The days that followed were days of great testing in our faith. We were reminded of what Rev Edmund Chan told us at our first retreat when we first came back. He said that we must be able to see God's track record in our lives. As we looked as far back as we could, yes, we saw His track records in our lives. We knew we have indeed heard Him. He cannot be wrong. We were thankful for a God-fearing agent who stood by us, prayed with us and finally, on the morning of 3 Sept at 12.30am, our house was sold. A buyer came and gave us a good offer.

We have downgraded from 1249sqft to 936sqft, a smaller house but we still each have our little room and little quiet corners and it is still call a home to us. Most importantly, we are on our way to a completely debt-free life (very rare in Singapore) as God has promised and....we managed to get a refund from the taxman. Yay! As we journeyed thru that period, our children witnessed how faithful God has been, how big our God is and we believed that those were lessons they will bring with them thru adulthood. We do not know yet as to what God has in store for us next but we are assured that we will always have a roof over our head, we could allow our children to pursue their passion, (it won’t be cheap, our kids are very different and we are weird parents, we don’t just follow, we create paths) and we could do what God wants us to do without worries. So there it is, the call to obedience.

When we recognised that Christianity is not a religion but a relationship with God, we live a life of victory!

Isaiah 55:9 & 11

As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts…so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

Yes, it has been long, long overdue.

I have been living in a whirlwind life since Sept. The children’s school, exams, going to lawyer’s office (ding-dong-ding-dong), home renovation, two assignments, one project, shift house….one survivor!

Looks like I've made it!

Visit to IMH

There are so much I want to write but circumstances just do not allow it. I have been busy, in fact, busy is an understatement. I have no words to describe what have been happening. For a start, I want to share with you about my visit to IMH which is all part of my study.

I first visited IMH, then, it was called the Woodbridge Hospital when I was in my 20s. I was there with my church group, bringing Christmas cheers and singing carols to the patients. It was a far cry from what I saw today. As I write, the images of Woodbridge Hospital just flooded my mind. It was a run-down place, very dark and dingy. I could still recalled that apart from the mental disorder patients, there were the deformed patients. As a young girl, it was overwhelming to witness all these.
Today, the hospital is so different. It is cheerful, bright and welcoming. It really makes everyone feel better for the patients. That is on the outside.

What I saw inside was heart wrenching. The patients live in bare necessity. They do not even have their own small area to keep their belongings. Yes, I understood the reason for doing that but it is a painful sight to see human dignity stripped down to just the bare minimum when one lives with a mental disorder. Looking back, it seems like my life is destined for the counselling world. At level, I visited St Theresa’s Home that was the place I first visited when I was in my teens. At level 2, I visited IMH, a place I visited when I was in my 20s.

What has God in store for me in this counselling journey? Nothing happens out of coincidence.

So much, so overwhelming, so stressed

It has been a stress-filled month. Two assignments and one project due. Home renovation and practicum to do. Yes, it has been one crazy month. I was half-way through my second assignment but decided to blog instead. Therapeutic.

Also in physical pain. Three mouth ulcers and I have a parent to meet tomorrow. I pray I will get better. You know, counselling is very therapeutic. Although, it is not for me, somehow the words that come out from my mouth, is so calming for myself.

Last week, I saw a girl. She doesn’t know who is her biological father. She now stays with her stepfather and her mother has remarried. So, “I have three fathers!” How complicating can one’s life get.

The year is ending soon. Ann will be in P5 next year and Kai sec 3 and I will be in my final year for my study. Stressed? I ain’t see nothing yet. But I promise myself that I will not get sucked into the lab and be one of the rats. Ann and Kai have more or less know what they want and what they are aiming for. I am not going to interfere. I think what they want is fine with me. No, I will not tell them they can’t make a living out of it. I was at the Eric Moo’s concert. He talked about his success journey. The only reason he went to school was for music. He failed his ‘O’ levels twice and failed his ‘A’ levels. Didn’t go to Uni but ended up in the Uni of LIFE. Wrote beautiful songs but was rejected three times. On the fourth try, he was discovered. The rest is history. Of course, the kids now live in a more complicated society but as long as they can find peace with themselves, that’s enough.

Ok, time to get back to my work! Before that, let me share with you one of my personal favourite.

I must write this down

I had a strange encounter last week. The sales manager from the movers was here to do the assessment. Nice, elderly man. After he has done what he was supposed to do, on his way out, he asked if this was a Christian family. I said yes! Then he started sharing with me his three dreams.

Dream 1
He dreamed of a beautiful church building. It was magnificent and very majestic. Very impressive. The strange thing, it was an empty church.

Dream 2
He was at a wedding ceremony. He was standing at the door, looking at the aisle. The bridegroom was at the end of the red carpet waiting but there was no bride.

Dream 3
He was at the wedding banquet, only the host was there and there was no guests.

Ok, I don’t want to spiritualise everything but I also believe that nothing happens by coincidence.

These three dreams were very similar to the thoughts and feelings I have been carrying…

1) Will a church building become so majestic and “upper class” that no one dares to step in? Or, it has become a life-less building?

2) Where is everyone when they are needed?

3) Then he said to his servants, ‘The wedding feast is ready, but those invited were not worthy.  Go therefore to the main roads and invite to the wedding feast as many as you find.’  And those servants went out into the roads and gathered all whom they found, both bad and good. So the wedding hall was filled with guests. (Matt 22:8-10)

The church must represent a place where people can boldly walk in and feel secured.

Oh, my birthday?

25th October has always been a special day for me. Even looking at the numbers, they felt special. Strangely, not this year. I almost forgot. The spouse asked me if I would like a birthday lunch or dinner. I said, “maybe lunch would be better since Ann has school the next day.” “But your birthday would be on a Saturday.” Oh, yes, I forgot.

I told myself, I would be turning 49 but a friend reminded, it is 48. Gasp, why did I want to age so fast. Perhaps, the age matters no more. Or the busyness of this period got into me.

On the day itself, it was the spouse again “Happy Birthday, Lao Po”. Oh yes, it is my birthday, today!



 
Ahhh…nice place for a birthday dinner with people I love…
away from the crazy crowd on a Saturday night!


My son. You got to love him unconditionally. I love you..in spite of.

Son : You still look the same!
Mum : Don’t bluff. You mean you were around 48 years ago?
Son : Ok, 14 years ago.
Mum : You mean when you were born, you already know how I looked?
Son : Mums…ok… 10 years ago and now, you still look the same!


My daughter. The free spirit. You got to give her space to bloom!

Ann : Ya, seriously, you know, seriously, you still look the same!
Mum : I have wrinkles now.
Ann : Where got wrinkles. Those are smile lines
Mum : You don’t end up as a lawyer, it will be a waste!
Ann : You haven’t change at all!


Thank you for the positive stroking, my children!


The spouse. Thank you for remembering, thank you for celebrating this special day!


The family is one of nature’s masterpieces. You don’t choose them, you just have them.

Oh yes, how can I forget the food!


The cheese platter. The blue cheese was the best. The rest are good quality cheese!


Ann’s lobster pasta. Portion just nice for her.

 
Mummy’s seafood platter. Ann asked why must have foam. Hahaha. Class mah!

 
The spouse’s duck confit. Crispy skin with tender meat.

 
Kai’s beef tenderloin. The one below is mash potatoes. Kai equate that to my mash potatoes! I got class too!

All in all, good food not costing an arm or leg. Just nice for a special occasion.

Finally…

Dessert which double up as my birthday cake. (From left to right)
Almond cream puff. Superb. Very fresh cream.
Blue berry cheese cake. Kai said it was good. It has to be good coming from a no-cake eater.
Hot lava cake. Rich, creamy chocolate, the cake just melt in your mouth.
Mango sorbet with crusty base. Very special. Nice!
Creme Brulee. Texture is just nice. Top nicely caramelised, not burnt.

Beautiful night, beautiful place with wonderful company. Oh yes, there was even fireworks nearby to celebrate my birthday…*wink*

To myself, to  more good years! Cheers

I think the stage will be her second home

 

Ballerina’s Poem
by Miranda Snow

Never will I be covered in tattoos
My legs and toes shall forever stay bruised.
I’ll never paint or carry a tune
Forever and ever, I’ll wear a tutu.

I won’t dye my hair pink or blue
My piercings will stay as the simple two
Nails cut short and hair in a bun
In ballet, this must be done.

Pink tights by the mound
Bobby pins all around
Leotards on the floor
Pointe shoes by the door.

Toes taped so tightly
Smiling big and brightly
Red lipstick adding to her beauty
The dancer moves so smoothly.

Turned out from my hips
No words coming from my lips
I dance sweetly to the sound
Ooh ballet, to you, I am bound.

Full of grace, never haste
Filling perfectly my costume of lace
Ever so sweet, my dancing feet
Step after step, I repeat and repeat.

Obtaining perfection is my key
It’s what I strive for, it’s all that defines me
Pushing harder and harder to reach my goal
It’s what I live for, ballet is my soul.

My toes may bleed
And my knees, grow weak
But I’ll never stop dancing…
Not until I reach my peak.

Pirouette, Pirouette
Dancer’s silhouette
Practicing at dusk
Dedication is a must.

Stretching my limbs
Choreographing on a whim
Alway aiming to be stronger
To hold my arabesque longer.

When I do finally reach that triple pirouette
and all is done and all is set
I put myself back into class
Aiming for a fourth, to be better than the last.

This is the life of a dancer en pointe
Risking the health of her feet, legs and joints
Just for that one perfect moment on stage
Where the ballerina stands tall and all are amazed.